Sandal

Ιανουαρίου 23, 2008

(Studio set with three people at a pondium and a host offset to the side. A stone leopard sits in the audience)
Host: Welcome to the first ever showing of Who’s Standing Next To Me. In this show the guests who all know each other have each filled out a card detailing interesting facts that tell us who they are but are not embarassing. I will give the audience and contestands clues that are on the cards but will not tell the name of the person that they belong to. The contestants can guess at any time as to the identity of our mystery person, however, a wrong guess will mean that they are replaced by someone else. When all three guests think that they are certain of the identity of the card holder we;ll reveal who was on the card. Are the contestants ready?
All three: Yeah!
Host: Is the audience ready?
Audience: Yeah!
Host: Am I ready?
Audience: No!
Host: Silly audience. All right first fact this person’s favorite author is L. Frank Baum. (fact goes up on a computer screen behind the contestants). Second fact: this person was born in Wichta, KS. (repeated action) Third fact: favorite color purple. (repeated action) Fourth fact: mother’s maiden name is Grenfield. (repeated action) Fifth fact: favorite television show is Dr. Who. (contestant raises hand) yes, contestant number two.
Con.2: (looks to the leopard) I’m scared.
Host: What?
Con.2: Well you see I don’t know who the person is but i do know that I’ve been doing very bad things.
Host: Perhaps you’d like to go see a priest.
Con.2: No, I want to be here. I want to say shit on the air.
Host: Brown bag, we need a brown bag over here!
Con.1: (leaning over and whispering to Con.3) I can’t believe he just said that.
Con.2: And I am glad I said it, do you here me glad! I never get to say it and now I can be a potty mouth and say whatever i damn well please.
(A producer runs out from the back room)
Producer: I’m afraid that we are having techical difficulties. If everyone can bear with me, we have to stop taping.
Con.2: That’s not true, that’s never true! He said that because this is a student broadcast and we can’t say bad words on the air but – (static and the blue screen of death. “Please stand by” sign pops up onto the screen. “Due to indefinitely”pops onto the screen. “You can go away now” pops up. “We mean it, turn off your tv and read a book” pops up. “You guys are just pathetic” pops up. “Really, you would rather stare at a blank screen then find some other means to entertain yourself” pops up. “All right if you won’t go we will” pops up and then the screen shuts off)